So this was Christmas. (Christmas 2013)

the weather stayed dark and gray all through Christmas, but the atmosphere was cozy and warm. i ate too much, like one does during the holidays. the kids were restless but joyful. everyone got great presents. i, of course got books! which i will make a separate post about at my book blog, soon. it was nice to be all together for once, i don't think i've been with around my whole family since summer. i mostly read, petted our old dog and cat who had suddenly gotten adorably fat. and i realized, that despite of growing up, Christmas to me, still feels like magic. just different kind of magic.

these are the places you will find me hiding. (a summer day)

Janni is still learning how to master the art of ice-cream eating. Jonna likes to growl at me like a wolf girl. Jesse has a passion for badminton and the lessons he's been taking for the past year has made him unbeatable. Nöpö recently turned 10 years old and even tho he still has the spirit of a one year old he has winter in his fur.

sure as the setting sun, you can’t trust just anyone.

a quote from Ze Frank's newest video On Leaving got me thinking about leaving, and staying, and the things that make you stay, even when you want to leave, especially, when you know that one day, you will. here's some things that make me happy that i have an other year right here, at home.

My room at home. it's my favorite place in the world. (i bought that cool world map just recently from Papershop.)

I get to celebrate the birthdays of my family and friends. and bake cakes for them.

Having pets to always keep you company ♥.

And all the little things that make this place home.

so the story behind me wondering and getting all deep about leaving and staying and stuff is this, like i briefly mentioned already, i applied to the local University but didn't get in. but what i don't think i've said here is that i also applied to a university in Edinburgh and i got in. but i decided to defer my entry until fall 2013 and try one more time to get to the universities here. staying is harder than leaving, sometimes. i don't know where i'm going to be next year this time, what i want to be doing, but right now, here is good.

a lot of life is about doing things that don't suck with people who don't suck.

lately i've been a lazy photographer, and much more into other things like drawing (okay more like doodling...), reading and just hanging out with people. spring's finally here, i think. we had a warm March but then it snowed again and now it seems it's getting warm again. tomorrow i start my last week working at the library, hopefully after that i'll feel like picking up my camera again. some exciting things are happening! more about them soon.

Happy Spring everybody!

all the trouble went away, and it wasn't just a dream.

i went and interrupted the perfect Cat Nap.

and i think he might have gotten a little mad.

"you know that point in your life when you realize that the house you grew up in isn’t really your home anymore. all of the sudden even though you have some place to put your shit, that idea of home is gone. or maybe it's like this rite of passage, you will never have that feeling again until you create a new idea of home for yourself, for your kids, for the family you start. it’s like a cycle or something. maybe that’s all family really is: a group of people that miss the same imaginary place." - Garden State

they say, home is where your heart is, but if that's true, i guess i've never really been at home. cause all my life, my heart has seemed to be all over the place. so, really i could say, my home is the busy streets of New York, green parks of London, smoky country bars of Nashville and rooftops of Paris. even tho i've only ever been to London. but right now, i guess my home is here, in the middle of nowhere, small town, southern Finland, with a farmer as a neighbor and fields of gold as far as the eye can see. i'm a city girl, but right now, this place, this home, seems quite okay.

time turns flames to embers, you'll have new septembers.

like i said, i might try to be a better blogger, or not, and i'm still not promising anything, but this is me trying. and like i said, i'm visiting my parents, enjoying my little vacation i have until i (voluntarily) go back to school in October. so, here are some little random moments from my visit.

this is my Home Sweet Home. was build in 1946 by my late grandfather and grandmother. and i can say it's still not exactly finished. but it's Home.

and at home there's always some company! even if mom&dad are working and my little brother is in a middle of a serious Halo marathin or something. this is our newest familymemeber, Kissa. yep, our cat's name is cat in finnish. i'd like to say it's cause Holly Golightly never named her cat in Breakfast at Tiffany's but it's just cause we never really gave him a name, and now it's too late, it's been 4 years.

paws are cute.

this is Nöpö (oh that name is lame.. maybe we ought not to name our pets, ever). he looks like a little sweetheart in this picture but he is quite stubborn and a wayward creature.

Lara is a Grand Old Lady, almost 11 years but she can still kick both Nöpö's and Kissa's asses.

sometimes i swear i live in the same house Augusten Burroughs grew up in.. we still had christmas lights on the window. and they're like the ugliest ones you can possibly find. this house is slightly crazy. in a less disturbing way tho than the housewhere you could run with scissors.

this is why i love autumn. apples. apple pie. pie! colors and the smell.

and di i mention, apples!

and the colors.

and mushrooms! well actually i don't like mushrooms. my sisters kids have recently learned that you can actually eat stuff you find from the forest, so now they're convinced we should make mushroom soup, from these. good thing is they realize, that some things are poisonous...

random. but reflections are pretty

okay this as exiting as life gets in a little town. but it's a nice change for the city. when you don't have to stay too long.